Us humans are the sum of our experiences. Whether the result of our culture, education, or past traumas, we store experiences that influence us in inexplicable ways. We file moments of discomfort deep in our minds and use them to protect us — should something reminiscent happen again.
Carrying our past can get heavy, especially when there’s something we can’t, or won’t, let go of. If we think of memories as archives in a file cabinet, our experiences are there forever to influence our future, until they fade with time or are replaced by newer moments.
Unpredictability is uncomfortable. And change is inevitable. So, how can you cope?
We can put ourselves in the driver’s seat and take back control of our mindsets, forging the futures we’ve always wanted. Our past impacts our identity, mindset, and behaviors in more ways than we could ever imagine. But by increasing our awareness, staying curious, and exploring what makes us tick as human beings, we can shift this dynamic. Sometimes it takes an acknowledgement for your past with an acceptance that you can’t change it to be able to show up for yourself proudly.
In the past two and a half years, we’ve been subjected to a kind of constant change that was never before experienced in our lifetime. So many of us felt out of control – sound familiar? Switching the lens, the pandemic has taught us how to pivot and adapt to a rapidly-changing environment of physical boundaries and a spectrum of emotions.
In forward-facing change, liberate yourself by moving with the moment – without forcing yourself to be go, go, go. If you take away one thing, remember this: move at your own pace.
Connection
In recent years of worldwide isolation, it’s amplified inwardly for those who already struggled with loneliness. Social connection has proven to lower anxiety and depression, and in a study by the National Library of Medicine, doctors Jessica Martino, Jennifer Pegg and Elizabeth Pegg Frates dubbed social interaction the “connection prescription.”
Open up
Interpret this how you will, but here I mean the windows. Soaking up the daylight, especially as the hours for this wane as we crawl into the winter months, can boost your serotonin and alleviate some of the stiffness you feel in being stuck in the past, or in your resistance to the future.
Practice gratitude
Now, here, I really mean opening doors internally. When done daily, it’s like flicking a switch – suddenly your internal receptiveness is alive. One of the most powerful rituals, research has shown it to have positive effects on the brain and overall health. Reflecting on what you do have rather than what you don’t or what you still want will recenter you in the present. It can be as simple as saying, “Thank you.”
Welcome all feelings
In short: none of them are bad. If you can identify your thoughts and feelings as they arrive, you’ll have more compassion toward them (and yourself). This can be done solo through meditation, journaling and intention, or it can be expressed with a friend, family member or coach. Our heads can grow crowded with all the noise in there, especially in times of grief or uncertainty, and voicing out loud them will free up some space. Imagine your inner flexibility as stretching out the constraints that have held you back (up until now).
Communicate
If the change you’re experiencing is at work, communication is vital to even the idea of change. Change, though a potential challenge, is just another word for opportunity. Consider this your chance to grow at a faster pace. Proactively stomp out rumors or guesswork by addressing issues directly. This could be the career shift you’ve been waiting for.
Expand your tolerance
Fear can easily fuel us, but it’s the choice to lead with empathy, clarity and kindness that will create organic solutions. Changing your mental state might not solve all problems, but it is sure to release your preoccupation with worry and insecurity. There’s something peaceful about “Everything happens for a reason” – at least, when things go your way. Finding a silver lining can take patience, but will deliver inner peace without expectations that ruin your reality.
Help someone
You open up your heart by loving someone, or by lending them your love – or hand. If you’re experiencing disruption, there’s a high chance that others are feeling its effects, too. Directing your compassion toward someone around you who, though they may not ask for it, needs it, will help you simultaneously in adapting to a changing environment.
